Brush Up Your ShakespeareCole Porterfrom the Broadway musical Kiss Me, Kate 1953 Kathryn Grayson-Howard Keel version The girls today in society Go for classical poetry So to win their hearts one must quote with ease Aeschylus and Euripides But the poet of them all Who will start them simply ravin' Is the poet people call The bard of Stratford-on-Avon. Brush up your Shakespeare. Start quoting him now. Brush up your Shakespeare, And the women you will wow. Just declaim a few lines from Othella, And they'll think you're a helluva fella. If your blonde won't respond when you flatter her, Tell her what Tony told Cleopaterer. If she fights when her clothes you are mussing, What are clothes? Much ado about nussing. Brush up your Shakespeare, And they'll all kowtow. With the wife of the British Ambassador, Try a crack out of Troilus and Cressida. If she says she won't buy it or tike it, Make her tike it what's more as you like it. If she says your behavior is heinous, Kick her right in the Coriolanus. Brush up your Shakespeare, And they'll all kow-tow. Think so? And they'll all kow-tow. Odds bodkins! And they'll all kow-tow. Brush Up Your ShakespeareCole Porterfrom the Broadway musical Kiss Me, Kate full (1948) book version The girls today in society Go for classical poetry, So to win their hearts, one must quote with ease Aeschylus and Euripedes, One must know Homer, and, b'lieve me, bo, Sophocle--also Sappo-Ho, Unless you know Shelley and Keats and Pope, Dainty debbies will call you a dope. But the poet of them all Who will start 'em simply ravin' Is the poet people call [take hats off to Shakespeare] "The Bard of Stratfod-on-Avon" Brush up your Shakespeare, Start quoting him now, Brush up your Shakespeare And the women you will wow. Just declaim a few lines from Othella And they'll think you're a helluva fella, If your blonde won't respond when you flatter 'er Tell her what Tony told Cleopaterer. If she fights when her clothes you are mussing, What are clothes? Much Ado About Nussing. Brush up your Shakespeare And they'll all kowtow. With the wife of the British Embessida Try a crack out of Troilus and Cressida If she says she won't buy it or tike it Make her tike it, what's more, As You Like It. If she says your behavior is heinous Kick her right in the Coriolanus. Brush up your Shakespeare, Start quoting him now, Brush up your Shakespeare And the women you will wow. If you can't be a ham and do Hamlet They will not give a damn or a damnlet, Just recite an occasional sonnet And your lap'll have Honey upon it. When your baby is pleading for pleasure Let her sample your Measure for Measure. Brush up your Shakespeare And they'll all kowtow Forsooth, I'Faith. Better mention The Merchant of Venice When her sweet pound o' flesh you would menace. If her virtue, at firsts, she defends -- well, Justs remind her that All's Well that Ends Well, And if still she won't give you a bonus, You know what Venus got from Adonis! If your goil is a Washington Heights dream Treat the kid to A Midsummer Night's Dream. If she then wants an all-by-herself night Let her rest ev'ry 'leventh or Twelf'-Night, If because of your heat she gets huffy, Simply play on and "Lay on, Macduffy!" Brush up your Shakespeare And they'll all kowtow. We trow, We vow. |